I was an “actress-” Immersed in a reality of hairdryers, make-up, and mirrors. Until one day when Reality came to visit me in my room.
It was rather unsolicited and completely unavoidable. It was as one who had grown up without a word for “couch,” only to one day look down and find that he was sitting on something soft. He might want to create a word for this new discovery. A word might come into consciousness- “couch.”
If I’d never heard the word “God,” I would have had to make one up, so tangible was the experience of That Which Was Experienced.
Of course I had heard the word. It weirded me out when people thanked it in Playbills and on Oprah. So sad, I thought, they must know it is really this crutch for The Stuff We Haven’t Figured out yet- stuff we can’t know through so-far science, that which is unexplainable, cruel and unfair, necessitating a fairytale of something, anything, so that we can sleep better and have quick comebacks for the kids. So, here, we’ll lump all that into a word “G-d” and eat it for an opiatic breakfast, and be okay. How embarrassed and scared must they inwardly be, to know that really they’d made it all up!
Then one day-
Then, here it all is in my room, consciousness, everywhere- everything Alive- everything.
A reality so much more different than another planet might be.
And nothing would ever be the same.
Oh my God!
“God-“ a previously useless and even suspect word, suddenly so much more real than the sofa beneath me. “Hello,” I whispered to I in the sofa.
I was immersed in the pool of One, of All, separate from nothing. A fish who had not known the water. Blessed out to oblivion and in love